There is an inner struggle between what you want and what you really need. This dynamic aspect sets up a powerful attraction – to people, to money but it’s not always good for you. There’s a need to learn to check in with yourself every now and then as your desire nature can lead you astray. Desires can get out of control. Lust can lead before the heart.
The square is an intense, super sexy aspect that oozes personal magnetism and charm. You may be seductive without even trying. Maybe you have a way with money, a knack for getting what you want – the ability to charm the birds from the trees.
Maybe you want to be consumed by love, perhaps you are an all consuming lover. Love makes you feel powerful or tears you apart from the inside with its claws. You may feel like you’re falling from crisis to crisis in relationships. You may be terrified to love and/or terrified to feel unloved. Love may feel like poison.
There may be a tendency to sabotage good relationships when fears are not addressed. Perhaps your suspicions drive your partner crazy. Perhaps your feel powerless in the face of love and seek to undermine it, before it pulls the rug from under your feet. You destroy the thing you love.
Romantic encounters may have a cathartic or karmic quality about them. You feel irresistibly pulled to someone like a magnetic force. Controlling relationships can be a problem when this aspect is not resolved internally. It’s hard to go with the flow. You may have blind spots when it comes to the object of your desires.
You may be drawn to vampires, forbidden love, bondage, sub-dom culture or underground play dens. Sexy stereotypes may figure as the sexual archetypes are twisted into something both acceptable and unacceptable i.e. a bad boy image. Relationship triangles may occur as well as rivals in love.
Essentially, this aspect whispers from a dark place “You can’t have love and power. You can only have one or the other” and it’s this terror of being transformed by love, the little death of orgasm that is absolute relinquishment of control – it is this that drives the Venus-Square Pluto native to distraction.
Maybe you feel that love and sex are two different things. Maybe you can’t imagine someone loving you after you did *that* together. Maybe you don’t sleep with those you truly love. Perhaps deep down, you feel unlovable, dirty or ashamed. You may have been abused. Maybe you don’t understand how love can be expressed through sex.
Resolving this aspect means being willing to be changed by love. Love is a cure. Love is healing. Venus can sooth those deep fears. You are not doomed to disaster in every relationship. Instead, Pluto says that you need to uncover the truth about love. You may need to go to some dark, uncomfortable places to get there but you can get there. Look to positive aspects (sextiles/trines) from Venus or from Pluto to see where some of the intensity can be siphoned off into other areas of life.
It’s about understanding what attracts you and why. It’s about confronting your shadows and shame. It’s about giving up any need to control – surrender.
Venus also represents harmony and self-esteem. To take the sting out of a difficult love life, it’s important to examine what you really feel about yourself and your body. Peace comes through loving the body you’re in – and that is a powerfully attractive quality. It is then that you can meet another as an equal, enjoy the give and take, be consumed and reborn again in the depths of passion. On the other side of destructive love is creative love, the kind where the whole becomes more than its sum of parts. This is a the hidden gift of Venus square Pluto.
Painting – ‘Passion’ by Frank Dicksee
hello! information about Venus square Pluto in natal chart is very accurate. I have this aspect. I still have Mars square Venus, Saturn sextile Venus, Moon trine Venus and Mars … I Pluto opposition. It’s not easy ????
Hi Mariela – Yes Pluto aspects are quite intense but also can be empowering too. It sounds like your Saturn and Moon could help to channel some of this powerful energy in your chart.
i have venus conjunct mars, both in cancer, and I have venus square pluto. I always attract people and even had quite a few obsessives. I’m terrified of letting my heart go and letting go of control though. I play endless games because I’m terrified that just as I’m starting to love, they’re gonna hurt me. I have a mechanism that i call point zero. It’s when somebody hurts me i rewind my emotions back to the day before i met them and carry on from there. Every memory of them is then erased.
Hi Matt – Your ‘point zero’ is very expressive of Venus/Pluto. Pluto is very much a planet that wipes the slate clean, especially when hurt. Pluto is also the planet of depth psychology too. It be worth looking back to see where the fear came from. That said, love can be terrifying! But therein lies its power to transform us 🙂
Hi Leah, I have an Aquarius ascendent, venus in Aquarius, Mars in Scorpio, sun in capricorn, moon and Jupiter in Aries, Saturn in Saggitarius and pluto in Scorpio.
I feel like I look lighthearted, fun and happy to the world, but as soon as a guy gets to know me it becomes so emotional and heavy. For every guy I’ve dated, it seems like they are the initiator and they show interest/like me first, then as soon as I like them.. They start to wander or look for someone else. If I don’t like them, I keep them.. But as soon as I start to like them they go away.. I feel like I can’t be genuine with anyone or else I’ll be heartbroken and abandoned just like before.. So now I don’t even bother. I just date people in where I have the power. If I like them.. I feel like this makes me weak. The last guy I dated for a year, left me for this obnoxious annoying girl 6 years younger I’m 26 and she’s 20, and she’s the exact opposite of me in the signs… How do I get over this power thing.. I feel extremely unattractive too, like gross. Others tell me I’m decently looking. How do I attract people I actually like?
Hi Mia
Thanks for your comment. I’m sorry you’re having a hard time in the world of love and romance. It is the area of life that tends to bring up all our demons!
You answered your own question when you said you feel ‘unattractive’ and ‘gross’. This is the place to start. Empower yourself through self love. When you like who you are then you can attract the people you like. If you would like to explore this further I offer readings here https://www.leahwhitehorse.com/readings
Leah, I am absolutely amazed by what you wrote. I have Venus (8.house in Capricorn) square Pluto (5.house in Scorpio) and I am struggling all the time with this aspect. It drives me crazy. I keep felling i n love with men who I hate and love in the same time. I cant separate it. Its probably some kind of fear of being in love because as you said its kind of toxic feeling for me. I am trying to figure out what actually attracts me to those men. Still no idea. But just to tell you to keep doing the great job. The best reading so far
Hi, I am a Libran born 22nd October & wonder what the eclipse holds today … thank you 🙂
Hi Mirela – Thanks for reading and for sharing your experience 🙂
Hi Karen – here’s my post on the lunar eclipse https://www.leahwhitehorse.com/2014/10/06/lunar-eclipse-october-2014-power-up/
I have Venus in Aquarius square Pluto in Scorpio! So accurate!!!
Venus is also my chart ruler. My Asc, Moon, and Jupiter are all in Libra. Charming the birds from the trees is an understatement. I can talk my way out of anything lol.
I do struggle A LOT with this aspect though. My Venus is also conjunct Saturn and I’m not sure how much that plays into it. Love has always been hard. The timing is never quite right. Or there is some obstacle that keeps me from it. My love is all or nothing though. I’ve never been interested in flings, but I do love to flirt. I also have Mars rx in Cancer trine Pluto. My Moon and Jupiter also semisquare my Pluto. All of my outer planets have squares to most of my inner planets. It’s tough.
Thanks for your comment Gracie – Yes Saturn will make a difference there. The timing issue in particular can be a Saturn manifestation. But squares keep us growing. They are tough, but we learn a lot with them too 🙂
I have this aspect with pluto conjunct ascendant in first and venus conjunct midheaven in 10th …… I feel so blocked in love and relations with women thats it infuriating, its in the stranges ways, i wish there was a way to stop it
im just wondering. i know venus and mars are classic romance planets. what happens when they are activated between two people, but not nessecarily with each other? for example.
the person with the tight natal venus square pluto, has these planets, opposing and squaring the other person’s sun , respectively.
and the other person has a tight natal mars square pluto, which is opposing and squaring the other person’s mercury respectively.
i feel like pluto being involved in these oppositions gives the relationship dynamic an intensity, passion, sexual vibe that might not otherwise be there if there were not pluto squares natally, as well as in synastry.
obviously, theres a lot more going on in the chart than what ive mentioned here. but i feel like even though sun /venus synastry is not thought of as sexual attraction, the inclusion of pluto squaring it, dramatically alters its energy and makes it a significant attraction. would you agree?
im still learning to modify interpretations of snastry by considering all aspects, but i have difficulty with it
Hi! thank you for posting this 🙂 I srsly can relate to everything written here. Especially that part where i feel dirty and ashamed when having sex.. and its really a serious problem for me. idk its like i can never feel lust for someone i love, i’ll have sex with them, to make love so to please them, but never bc i lust for them. thats also why im never satisfied when we sex bc i cant show my wild side. I can only get satisfied when its one night stands tbh. Lol. But anyway, im wondering if one has this aspect natally does the persons venus square the whole generation’s pluto?? sorry im new to astrology and I just actually read that to a forum, is it? cos they say pluto is a generational planet Thank you so much!! sorry for my bad english too x
Hi Mel – Yes Pluto is a generational planet. All of us have a Pluto in our charts though so it’s about looking at the personal meaning of that planet in the context of your chart. You can look at what Pluto means for your generation (depending on what sign it is) and then you can think of how this aspect which is personal to you might be part of that generational experience.
Hi Leah – thanks for your excellent insights. I have Venus square Pluto but with an 18 degree orb.
Would your article still apply to me?
Thanks, glad you enjoyed my post Caroline. 18 degree orb would be too wide for a square. Generally I use up to 10 degrees if it’s the Sun or Moon involved and 8 degrees if it’s any of the other planets.
Hi!
I would just like to say that this is incredibly accurate and enlightening! You did a brilliant job. Thank you very much!!
Thank you Bridgette 🙂
Brilliant article. You amaze me, that’s the only bad aspect in my natal chart, and what I can say is that the behavior with this aspect come so through the subconsciousness mind that you even get scary about the way you acted when it come to be loved by the partner. Like you said, It’s about giving up any need to control, and surrender, so true.
Dear Leah, I love your forecasts. I have Venus square Pluto in my chart. I feel like it’s one of my strongest aspects. I have always had a very difficult time in terms of love, relationships and acceptance. I was a late bloomer and only started becoming romantically involved with people in my mid to late 20’s. I haven’t been in a certified “real” relationship yet, although I’ve definitely had at least one thing very close to it that I’m currently involved with now. This aspect makes a lot of sense for me, because although I love being alone and cherish independence, I am terrified that I will end up going through life without ever experiencing a real relationship. Right now I’m traveling and exploring different people in my life, and so I’m finally learning how to relinquish control and surrender to the randomness of the universe…
Complicating matters, Venus is in Aquarius (my moon is Gemini) and Pluto is in Scorpio (which is also my rising and Mars sign)…so talk about wants and needs being opposed!
Just wondered if you have any advice on how to siphon my fears and need to be obsessive in matters of love. No other aspects with Venus, but sextile between Pluto with the Sun & Mercury. You are so incredibly gifted and I love reading your words every day! Amy
Hi Amy
Apologies for the delayed response. It’s been a very busy week! With Pluto aspects, the answer is most often found in shadow-work, deliberately focusing on those unconscious motivations, the ‘darker’ stuff that we all have a tendency to push away in our minds. I would strongly recommend checking out Kelly Ann Maddox on Youtube and look for her playlist on Shadow-work. Kelly is brilliant, really knows her stuff and offers a lot of ideas for how to do this.
Hello Leah on the White Horse,
What a name you have! is that your real name?
I find your comments really to the point. My chart has, like JT’s (you did not comment on his or her post), a square between Pluto on the asc (in Virgo in my case) and Venus on the MC (in Gem).
In my case, Pluto and Venus are in the resp. 12th. and 9th. houses, and since the signs are not so “heavy” also, this aspect is maybe a little less intense as can be.
But … they appear on asc and mc and so, they are very present in my life.
Reading about this aspect, I now suddenly understand why it always seems like the relationship I am involved in since 25 years, is my biggest accomplishment.
Like described here, I have always had many difficulties with love, distinguishing love from sex, coping with the fact that men so easily fell in love with me, while I felt there was no reason at all for that and it did not diminish my insecurity one bit…and feeling so consumed by everything involving love…Leaving me to try and understand all that
And until today, I have this sinking feeling that my lifemate will finally see through me one of these days and his love will come to an end. That feeling, of the rug that will be pulled from under my feet, can pop up every day.
I am still fighting multiple emotional battles with myself trying to overcome those feelings.
Luckily, we really like eachother and our bond is unbreakable in many ways, but I do not think, I could ever talk about these insecurities.
I am happy to know now, it is just a Venus-Pluto square:-)
Thanks for your work,
greetings from Holland,
M.
I have this aspect (Venus in Leo square Pluto in Scorpio), and along with my Scorpio moon conjunct Pluto, I think I get more obsessive with sexual attractions towards men than someone without a Moon-Pluto aspect. If I find a guy attractive,I can’t stop thinking about him. This is usually an actor or a singer. I think I’m into these unattainable guys because of Pluto in Scorpio square Saturn in Aquarius. Any insight regarding the obsessiveness?
Hello
I have venues in leo in the 11th house squarinig pluto in scorpio in the first house. And my rising is in libra so my ruler planet is venues,with leo sun. How is it affecting me with this cobination in my relationships? could u tell me please?
I also have moon in virgo in the 11th house conjucting my venues
WOW! This piece is so insightful and true. It puts into words so beautifully the experience that I live. The struggle is so real between love and power. The need to control, in my case not for malicious intent, but for self preservation.
My parents were as good as they could be but my early experiences left me without an ounce of faith in marriage or partnership. I now believe, if you want a good life you must provide for yourself. It creates so much distance when all I crave is that true harmonious blending where two become one. But my actions (Venus SQ Mars) often prevent the very things I crave. Always left wanting is the tone of my love life.
Hi Leah,
Thanks for sharing such an accurate description! I feel like I’ve been sitting under a tree all these years and an apple finally fell on my head. (Metaphorically speaking). Because of this placement, in my chart, would a partner with Venus in Scorpio be a good match? Mine is in Capricorn.
Cheers
Hi Genevieve, there are many factors to take into account when looking at chart synastry but yes a Venus in Scorpio would tend to have a good understanding with a Venus in Capricorn as these two signs create a sextile with each other. They may not like exactly the same things but they are willing to try what their partner likes to maintain harmony.
This is beautiful! Gives me hope. 🙂 Thank you!