There is an inner struggle between what you want and what you really need. This dynamic aspect sets up a powerful attraction – to people, to money but it’s not always good for you. There’s a need to learn to check in with yourself every now and then as your desire nature can lead you astray. Desires can get out of control. Lust can lead before the heart.
The square is an intense, super sexy aspect that oozes personal magnetism and charm. You may be seductive without even trying. Maybe you have a way with money, a knack for getting what you want – the ability to charm the birds from the trees.
Maybe you want to be consumed by love, perhaps you are an all consuming lover. Love makes you feel powerful or tears you apart from the inside with its claws. You may feel like you’re falling from crisis to crisis in relationships. You may be terrified to love and/or terrified to feel unloved. Love may feel like poison.
There may be a tendency to sabotage good relationships when fears are not addressed. Perhaps your suspicions drive your partner crazy. Perhaps your feel powerless in the face of love and seek to undermine it, before it pulls the rug from under your feet. You destroy the thing you love.
Romantic encounters may have a cathartic or karmic quality about them. You feel irresistibly pulled to someone like a magnetic force. Controlling relationships can be a problem when this aspect is not resolved internally. It’s hard to go with the flow. You may have blind spots when it comes to the object of your desires.
You may be drawn to vampires, forbidden love, bondage, sub-dom culture or underground play dens. Sexy stereotypes may figure as the sexual archetypes are twisted into something both acceptable and unacceptable i.e. a bad boy image. Relationship triangles may occur as well as rivals in love.
Essentially, this aspect whispers from a dark place “You can’t have love and power. You can only have one or the other” and it’s this terror of being transformed by love, the little death of orgasm that is absolute relinquishment of control – it is this that drives the Venus-Square Pluto native to distraction.
Maybe you feel that love and sex are two different things. Maybe you can’t imagine someone loving you after you did *that* together. Maybe you don’t sleep with those you truly love. Perhaps deep down, you feel unlovable, dirty or ashamed. You may have been abused. Maybe you don’t understand how love can be expressed through sex.
Resolving this aspect means being willing to be changed by love. Love is a cure. Love is healing. Venus can sooth those deep fears. You are not doomed to disaster in every relationship. Instead, Pluto says that you need to uncover the truth about love. You may need to go to some dark, uncomfortable places to get there but you can get there. Look to positive aspects (sextiles/trines) from Venus or from Pluto to see where some of the intensity can be siphoned off into other areas of life.
It’s about understanding what attracts you and why. It’s about confronting your shadows and shame. It’s about giving up any need to control – surrender.
Venus also represents harmony and self-esteem. To take the sting out of a difficult love life, it’s important to examine what you really feel about yourself and your body. Peace comes through loving the body you’re in – and that is a powerfully attractive quality. It is then that you can meet another as an equal, enjoy the give and take, be consumed and reborn again in the depths of passion. On the other side of destructive love is creative love, the kind where the whole becomes more than its sum of parts. This is a the hidden gift of Venus square Pluto.
Painting – ‘Passion’ by Frank Dicksee