I’m running away from Mother, past the flower seller in the street. My feet slip on the muddy ground. My shoes are some kind of sacking material. My linen dress is blue and white, old, dirty and far too big for me. I’m quick but not quick enough. I feel her hands, one in my hair, one on the collar of my dress. She pulls me around to face her.
She’s so tall and I’m scared of her. I look into her eyes and suddenly I see that she was my Grandmother in this life. In this life she was tall too but her eyes were kind, her heart full of love. In this old life, we are in France, Normandy I think…and she’s cold and hard and beaten by poverty. I was beaten too.
One day I came home to find her sat in the only chair we had, hard and wooden. Her head was rolled back, eyes half open, congealed blood filled her mouth. I remember looking, understanding, feeling nothing. I just took her shawl because she didn’t need it any more.
I walked, intending to find out what was beyond this city but then the cathedral caught my eye. It seemed to call me so I snuck inside. It’s decorated ceiling was as high as heaven! I was in awe, in love. The majesty of this place! It was immediate and complete. This was where I found my faith. I realised at this moment that my lives had always been about faith and the search for meaning. Spirituality has been my constant. Spirit at my side.
There was a priest, dressed in red. He was young and kind. His dark eyes took pity on me. I don’t know where I lived or how but I do know he watched over me. He fed me, read me passages from the bible, taught me. My mind was quick, even though I never went to school. I had no one but him and God. Back in France, I trusted him. As I grew older, I began to love him as a woman but it was never possible. He was a priest and he loved me as a daughter.
I passed away from pleurisy in an old wooden bed. I was so cold and alone. When I died, he came from spirit to greet me and our meeting was full of joy. Everything was understood. In our lives we alternate, him and I – father and daughter, mother and son, brother and sister, husband and wife…There are many kinds of love.
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The memories above were generated from a past life meditation. Since childhood I have had memories, impressions and many dreams offering information from past lives and life in the spirit world. Mostly they are snippets of information pieced together over many years. Some are purposeful exercises to generate memories. So far I have discovered I have been :-
- A VERY nasty man who was obsessed with dark magic, control and power in what I would assume was Persia back in the old days. (I used to repeatedly write something ‘backwards’ when I was a child and although garbled now, I believe it was a spell or incantation this man used to use which was a form of Arabic writing. After this past life exercise, I never wrote it again!). My best friend in my present life was my son in this ancient life. I was imprisoned and killed for practising black arts (and more likely because I’d murdered two people!). Sometime BCE.
- A woman who died in the gutter of starvation in the middle ages in England. She had faith but little else.
- The little French girl above – around the 1700’s. I *think* my name may have been Nicolette but I’m unsure.
- A Mother in India (an Indian friend dreamed of my past life name which was Padmavati – meaning lady with a lotus. Thank you P. You know who you are!). I dreamed of a full ceremony where my son was ‘married’ to the temple Goddess for one year which was seen as a very high honour. I was a proud Mum! No time context as yet.
- Possibly (and this may be too way out there in woowoo land for some…) a life on another planet. Our forms were less ‘solid’ than here but the society was complex and advanced. My Father was someone important and I got the feeling I didn’t live up to his expectations or what was expected of me in that society.
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When I first started to read tarot, I used the Arthurian Deck by Caitlin and John Matthews. I would often find that Judgement, the Wheel of Fortune and the Tower would come up together to indicate important karmic situations.
These days, I find that the presence of Judgement can alert me to a situation that involves the journey of the soul. These are soul contracts and karmic bonds. If you are reading about a close relationship (whether romantic or otherwise), the presence of the Judgement card may alert you that there is a greater meaning to your connection.
If you look at the Judgement Card in the Rider Waite deck, you can see that there is clearly as issue that goes ‘beyond the grave’ here. The Angel’s trumpet loudly sounds to remind us that there are higher orders at work. It also suggests that there is life after death. Typically it is the card of resurrection. In my belief system, it signifies reincarnation, the new body born from an eternal soul. It also alludes to life between lives – the journey of the soul in the world of spirit. Note that Judgement also has other meanings too, this is just in the context of this post on karma and past lives.
Recently, I have discovered that the Page of Pentacles also has a lot to say about karma. When you work with your cards regularly, you’ll find that each develop new meanings over time. Each new meaning doesn’t discard with either the traditional meaning, nor previous personal meanings. It’s a new layer, added depth. Just like people, each card has many stories to tell and facets to their personality.
I believe that before we come back to the Earth school, we decide on certain life lessons to learn – certain situations that are specifically for our soul’s growth. In astrology, it’s possible to explore this through studying the nodes of the chart as well as the 12th house and other aspects.
Often, I tend to find that when these life lessons are triggered there is a curious feeling of ‘fate’ that is attached to them and often a strong push to go in a certain direction. Things may feel out of your hands. Often that sense of lack of control is a reminder that it’s time to bypass the ego and give way to the urge of the soul. What you want and what you need may be two very different things.
You may find that you receive powerful guidance through dreams, synchronicity and meditation. Note that when it comes to love relationships just because someone is your soul mate or the situation has karma attached to it, it doesn’t necessary mean that you are meant to be with that person ‘forever’ in this life. Karma is about learning so there is something you are learning together. Each soul has agreed with the other to take part in this learning process. It’s the lesson that is important.
The Page of Pentacles in the context of karma is a reminder that the lesson has now begun. You are now in class so to speak so pay attention.
One last note here :- I don’t believe karma is about crime and punishment. I do believe it’s simply about learning and spiritual development through each incarnation.
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Tarot, Karma and Past Lives – Cards and combinations
The following are just some suggestions to work with. You may find your own combinations appearing depending on how your deck speaks to you or you may have different cards which signify karma altogether. Also, this will depend on your personal belief system and reincarnation understanding. As always, it’s what makes sense to you as the reader that matters.
Six of Cups
A card of the past, nostalgia, childhood.
May indicate a young soul.
Six of Cups and Judgement
The events of the past/a previous life are currently in play.
The feeling of knowing someone as soon as you meet them – recognition.
High Priestess/The Hermit and Judgement
May indicate an old soul
Judgement and Justice
A previous karmic action has resulted in a certain consequence in this life. This is NOT about being punished for a bad decision in a past life. This is simply about resetting the balance and coming to an understanding of how certain actions can affect others.
Two of Cups/Lovers and Judgement
Love beyond death, eternal love, soul mates
Three of Cups and Judgement
Your soul group
A karmic lesson. Pay attention.
(Sometimes with Judgement too but often alone)
Page Pentacles and the World
The karmic lesson is complete.
Note – I sometimes see this when relationships have ended. This brings with it the sense that a karmic contract has been completed.
Ace of Swords and Page Pentacles/Judgement
There is a decision to make. The karma here is in the decision making process itself. This card combination can sometimes show up when any future information seems blanked out or the reading ends on the Ace of Swords when the client has asked about a certain decision. On a spiritual level it can mean that the lesson is in the ability to make the decision for yourself. You have all the information you need and now it’s up to you to trust your next step. The universe isn’t going to hold your hand here!
Judgement and the Ace of Wands
Spiritual communication/communication from the other side. Ghosts.
Judgement, Death, Ace of Wands
Life after death, the soul freed from the confines of the body.
Hierophant and Judgement
Your spirit guide/s
With the Ace of Wands, it can indicate direct communication with your Guide.
The Star and Judgement
Possibly a life on another planet.
Sometimes combined with the World to simply indicate ‘another world in the stars‘.
The beautiful ‘Karma’ card shown at the top of this post is the Judgement card from the Tarot of the Old Path by Sylvia Gainsford and Howard Rodway.
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If you are interested in knowing more about your past lives and karma, I can read on this subject using a combination of astrology and tarot. You must know your time of birth for this reading. If you would like to book, please go to my readings page and choose the Astro-Tarot Reading.